So first I wanted to say thank you to my mom and dad for watching Cole the other day so that I could get a run in. I ran the Tinkerbell race last Sunday and then I didn’t get a chance to run again until Thursday. Sometimes life just gets in the way and there is no time for running but for me…I need to run to stay sane. I called my mom Wednesday night and she agreed to keep Cole Thursday morning just so I could get out and pound the pavement.
I had a plan on where I was going to run but when I got to my parents house they gave me a better route and I had a great run. The only bad part about the run was that there was a lot of concrete and I really try to run the track or streets just to save my legs! I was able to run on the grass and street part of the way so that helped a lot! One of my favorite parts of the run was the convention center stairs. Yes, I loved it so much that after running the stairs in the front of the convention center, I ran the ones in the back too!
Running downtown is just beautiful.
The weather could not have been any better for running and I just loved looking out over the water to see the Coronado Bridge!
I ran all the way down to the midway and I am always surprised at how big it is when you are actually standing underneath it. From the street it just isn’t so intimidating.
I rounded the corner and realized that I was near a statue that was placed downtown in 2007. (I can’t believe I haven’t been down to see it before now.) It was really only supposed to stay for a short time but as remained there until now. It is 25 feet tall and neat to be able to walk right up to it.
As I was appoaching the 4th mile of my journey I came across a man sitting on a park bench playing his saxaphone. He looked at he didn’t have a care in the world and was just lost in his music.
Although I love running the hills near my house. I also loved running in downtown.
So last night we went out for date night. It was the usual group plus two so it was pretty fun. We started off at the Brig for a drink or two because well we always have to either start or end the evening with the Brig…BTW I love the Brig. When Barret and I have our date nights before our musicals we always do the Brig for a fun atmosphere and yummy food.
Last night we decided to go a little crazy and venture off into North Park for a new restaurant in a different part of town.
West Coast Tavern
At first I was a little skeptical only because I like the restaurants around here and they are close to home and easy, but taking the 7.36 mile trek out a bit further was really fun. I decided that I wanted to document our evening by taking a few casual pictures, but immediately everyone was making fun of me and getting mad at the obnoxious flash on my phone…but who care right? I have some fun pictures to share now!
We had some drinks…
Beer for the boys...of course
and wine for the girls...
The food was well good, but a little different too…We kind of got a bunch of different things to share just to get a taste of everything…
Bacon and Bleu Cheese Flatbread and Wings
Mac'n Cheese with chicken and shallots?!
We also had Angus Beef Sliders, which were my favorite part of the dinner and artichoke and spinach dip that tasted more like a cream cheese with artichoke oil in it that was not good at all. They even made me try a mussel…yuck!
So awhile back I wrote about family dinners. Let’s start with my life is crazy and a family dinner these days is really unheard of. Now when I say family dinner I mean everyone eating together, the same meal without TV and in the same place. We used to try to make it to the kitchen table but if you know anything about my house, if you can see the kitchen table it is a good day. Most days it is stacked to the top with “stuff” to be put away. And even when that “stuff” is put away more “stuff” magically appears…it does…this is no joke.
Family dinner is also a difficult task because Tuesdays and Thursdays we have karate until 5, which means we don’t get home until 5:30. And by the time I get anything out for dinner, it is past 6 and the kids are cranky and ready to just be done for the evening. The other problem with family dinner is that my kids eat nothing…no really nothing! Their meals literally consists of mac n’ cheese, hots dogs (Druw eats ketchup on a bun) pizza, pasta, and chicken nuggets…that’s it!
Tonight was a family dinner. We had green mac n cheese…PESTO. It is all in the name though. If I had said we were eating pesto guaranteed no one would have even come to the bar. Yes, we ate at the bar. Now that Cole is sitting in a booster seat at the bar Barret and I both have to stand at dinner. Not ideal but then again a family dinner is necessary sometimes. After we were all together the crying, fighting, “I don’t want anymores,” ”the how much more do I have to eats” come out, “Cole is poking me with a fork”, “Can I finish watching my show” well you get the picture…a lovely dinner time hour. Then we decide to go around and tell each other about our days. Druw always has to be the director of this. He always determines the order we can talk it and who can talk and when that person has said enough. There is arguing and fighting, tears and laughter, very little eating, a few inappropriate noises…all in all even though it is a little painful and long to have a family dinner I love them when we have them!
So I made it! Another 13.1 in the books. I can’t say I am beyond excited only because I was hoping to make it under 2 hours and I came up a little short with a 2:01:55…all that means to me is that I need to run another race… (Secretly…Yippeeee).
Well the weekend started a bit slow. I really wanted to get up to Anaheim midday and have time to look at the expo and not be too stressed…well didn’t didn’t exactly happen. Jake’s baseball try-outs that had been rained out the week before so of course that throws off everything for me. Barret took Jake to the field at 9:30AM and I stayed home to catch up on cleaning, laundry and packing just so that the second the try outs were over we could be on our way to the race. (And I had to figure out the perfect outfit for the race).
What do you think of this?
Well that being said I didn’t pick them you until after 12 noon so we actually didn’t even get an the road until 12:30…
But 12:30 hit and I was trying to keep my stress to a minimum and we were off for a night with no kiddos and a fun race. All in all the timing actually could not have worked out better. (I just need to not sweat the small stuff). We got to the expo at around 3:00 and it seemed to not be quite as busy as I had anticipated. I was able to get my goodie bag, which wasn’t much of a goodie bag. It was a shirt with some pins in it.
TinkerBell Shirt
Barret was great and walked around to every booth with me and didn’t even complain too much. This expo wasn’t as good as the Disneyland 1/2 but still we got some free yogurt and a bunch of samples of protein/carb bars. We didn’t wait in line for any of the wheels, which was fine with me because I usually just win some dumb pen that doesn’t even work. I did end up buying a timer from the Jeff Galloway booth and a new glowing ring from another booth. ( The one I wore for Las Vegas was blue and I had to represent Tinkerbell so I needed a green one.)
Green Glow Ring
New Timer
Before leaving the Expo I ran into an old friend from high school who was running her first half marathon. She was there with her two sisters and mom so they were making a girls weekend of it. Then I went to the Grand California Hotel and said hello to my cousin, who just happened to be visiting Disneyland for a family vacation. As we approached the dinner hour Barret and I decided to hit the ESPN Zone for a drink and some dinner.
Here’s to 13.1
The official start time for the race was 5:45AM so an early night for us and a 4:00AM wake call.
5:45AM...ugh
Maureen and I decided to try out the Jeff Galloway method of run walk run and actually did it at 4 minutes running and then 1 minute walking. I am not sold on the method and I think I need to practice it a little more, but I was glad to try it and maybe try it again on a few of the shorter races. After taking off from the start line the first 4 miles move very slow because you are in and out of the park dodging people and it was super dark, so I kind of felt like I was playing catch up for the the last 2/3 of the race to make up time. I was very excited to see Barret along the way at mile 11. He gave me the last push I need to make it to the end.
Do my feet really go out like that?!
Thanks for coming out, Honey!
..over all my splits looked like this…
Distance
HALF MAR
Clock Time
2:04:19
Chip Time
2:01:55
Overall Place
581 / 9386
Gender Place
581 / 9386
Division Place
117 / 1799
Age Grade
54.7%
5K Split
31:43
10K Split
1:00:47
15K Split
1:29:20
Me and Maureen at the finish line
Finishers Medal
And the weekend would not be complete without lunch in Laguna Beach and a Bloody Mary…
So last night a friend of mine and I went to a seminar/discussion with Jeff Galloway. I have being hearing about Jeff Galloway for at least 6 months now because of the Disneyland half marathon in September. He was one of their key speakers at the expo and I have been wanting to hear him talk. With Tinkerbell this weekend I was excited to see that he again is on the schedule for talking at the expo, but unfortunately I wasn’t going to be in Anaheim in time to hear him talk, but then…like magic it turns out that he was in San Diego for a talk that I could go to.
Jeff Galloway is one of these people who can just fire you up about running. He is so passionate and it almost feels like he wants you, individually, to run well and without injury. His whole philosophy is a run-walk-run strategy. At first I was not buying it. I really love to run and telling me that I will run faster if I walk part really didn’t make sense to me. He started the talk with just the basics of his program and where he came from. (He was an Olympic runner, so he must know something about running, and running fast?!) Then after only about 10 or 15 minutes he just took questions from the audience. Luckily it was a smallish group of us and the questions that were presented were all pretty relevant to everyone, with the except of a couple people asking very specific questions about themselves.
A couple of weeks ago Maureen and I decided to kind of try out his method before we actually went to hear him talk. So we ran 10 miles and stopped and walked every 10 minutes to walk for 1 minute. For Maureen we actually ran the 10 miles in the fastest amount of time she has ever run it. And we ran it and really didn’t feel quite as tired as usual…interesting?!
Ok, so back to the method. Jeff says that if you want to keep a 9 minute pace you should use a 4 to 1 ratio…run 4 minutes and then walk just 1 minute. By doing this you are keeping your muscles fresh each time you start again after the 1 minute walk break. It should make you feel less tired and able to finish the last 1/3 of the race without stopping and finish fast! Ok so I am still a bit skeptical, but I really think it will be interesting to try out.
My main goal for Tinkerbell and every race is also to finish, but along with that I really would love to run in under 2 hours. Las Vegas was 2:01 so TinkerBell watch out…hope I can do it!
So I officially have not run in over a week. Make that 1 week and 2 days…ugh. I ran 10 miles a week ago Saturday. It was a beautiful run. Mission Beach, the Catarman, Ocean and the Bay all mixed in one. I thought pretty much the whole way, “why don’t I run this more often?” The weather was perfect as well, which just made it all the better. Anyway that was a week and 2 days ago.
During my run I felt that my ankle was starting to hurt…just a little nagging, but I knew deep down this wasn’t good. I do most, if not all my training at the track or the streets between my house and the track. I thought well 10 miles I would change it up a bit, but low and behold…concrete…the KILLER! The ground is just not made for runners. There is nothing to absorb the shock of the ground and goes directly back up into the body…bummer.
That being said I rested a few days afterward hoping that the pain was going to go away, but I knew after a day or so that my heel was actually not sitting right. Luckily have an amazing doctor who I knew would not tell me not to run, but rather fix me up in order to run again sooner. Off I went to see Dr. Allen. He literally pulled on my foot and put my heel back into the correct spot and moved the bones in my feet to their correct spot and now after a few sore days I am back in business! I still have not officially run, but I have taken a few good walks and have had no pain in the ankle or foot.
TinkerBell 1/2 Marathon is less than a week away and I could not be more excited to put my running shoes on and take the 13.1 challenge once again through the streets of Disneyland. I am hoping the weather holds up and no rain even though I am pretty sure I am going to freeze, but either way it is the happiest place on earth right?!
So I have found myself reading all kinds of blogs lately. Some are people I know and some are ones that I have just stumbled upon. It is so strange how diverse blogs can really be. It really is a mystery to me why I write a blog and who the heck would even read it or why they would read it. I feel like the blogs I end up reading are me just being nosey about other people or it is because I need advice on something and someone wrote it in their blog so it must me interesting to read…I guess anyway you look at it a blog can be just about anything!
So why is it that every time you want to start a new project it is one step forward and fifteen steps backwards? My family has had a box of home videos on VHS for sometime (well actually like 20 years). I read somewhere like 5 or 6 years ago that VHS tapes only last 15 to 20 years so I began to panic that I must do something soon or those memories will be all gone. ( Too bad it took me 5 to 6 years to do something quick.) It wasn’t until recently when I began transferring those tapes that I realized that maybe the tapes being no good would have been a good thing…the 80’s were not kind…hehehe).
Anyway we started at Costco and found out it would be over $300 to transfer the movies to DVD and then we would still have to go through those DVDs and have to organize and transfer them yet again into any form of movie with an appropriate time line. Then it was off to buy the converter. This little machine plugs into a VCR and then runs the movies onto your computer where they are stored (taking up lots of room on the hard drive) and then you get so see all of the lovely memories in color and sound. Easy enough! I’ll do it…no problem…
Well that was the first problem. As I look at the box of VHS tapes sitting on the office floor I figure they will be there at least…3 months. The tapes are old and have no tracking on them so most tapes come out with terrible sound and no tracking. Others have no sound and great pictures…and another just doesn’t play and the VCR makes a choking sound (what the Hell does that mean.)
I figure after about 3 months of organizing and watching terribly old, bad movies I may end up with about 2 hours of material that…well..no one will want to watch!
So after almost seven years a family friend of ours had a baby. A perfect baby boy 6 pounds 11 oz. She had a lot of bumps in the road, but as of 9PM last night her dreams came true. It is the best feeling to hear the news and know that everything finally worked out for her and she is well on her way to the world of motherhood.
As I was thinking of her and reading facebook last night there was a you tube video that I came across that was just so fitting and really touched me.
I am always telling my mom it is so comforting to hear stories from other moms and their struggles and triumphs so this message just seemed to fit perfectly.
As I scrolled down and looked at more entries another mom had a blog entry that I just couldn’t put down:
“Every time I’m out with my kids – this seems to happen:
An older woman stops us, puts her hand over her heart and says something like, “Oh- Enjoy every moment. This time goes by so fast.”
Everywhere I go, someone is telling me to seize the moment, raise my awareness, be happy, enjoy everysecond, etc, etc, etc.
I know that this message is right and good. But as 2011 closes, I have finally allowed myself to admit that it just doesn’t work for me. It bugs me. This CARPE DIEM message makes me paranoid and panicky. Especially during this phase of my life – while I’m raising young kids. Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I’m not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I’m doing something wrong.
I think parenting young children (and old ones, I’ve heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they’ve heard there’s magic in the climb. They try because they believethat finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it’s hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.
And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers – “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU’LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN’T!” TRUST US!! IT’LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!” - those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.
Now. I’m not suggesting that the sweet old ladies who tell me to ENJOY MYSELF be thrown from a mountain. These are wonderful ladies. Monkees, probably. But last week, a woman approached me in the Target line and said the following: “Sugar, I hope you are enjoying this. I loved every single second of parenting my two girls. Every single moment. These days go by so fast.”
At that particular moment, Amma had arranged one of the new bras I was buying on top of her sweater and was sucking a lollipop that she must have found on the ground. She also had three shop-lifted clip-on neon feather stuck in her hair. She looked exactly like a contestant from Toddlers and Tiaras.I couldn’t find Chase anywhere, and Tish was grabbing the pen on the credit card swiper thing WHILE the woman in front of me was trying to use it. And so I just looked at the woman, smiled and said, “Thank you. Yes. Me too. I am enjoying every single moment. Especially this one. Yes. Thank you.”
That’s not exactly what I wanted to say, though.
There was a famous writer who, when asked if he loved writing, replied, “No. but I love having written.” What I wanted to say to this sweet woman was, “Are you sure?Are you sure you don’t mean you love having parented?”
I love having written. And I love having parented. My favorite part of each day is when the kids are put to sleep (to bed) and Craig and I sink into the couch to watch some quality TV, like Celebrity Wife Swap, and congratulate each other on a job well done. Or a job done, at least.
Every time I write a post like this, I get emails suggesting that I’m being negative. I have received this particular message four or five times – G, if you can’t handle the three you have, why do you want a fourth?
That one always stings, and I don’t think it’s quite fair. Parenting is hard. Just like lots of important jobs are hard. Why is it that the second a mother admits that it’s hard, people feel the need to suggest that maybe she’s not doing it right? Or that she certainly shouldn’t add more to her load. Maybe the fact that it’s so hard means she IS doing it right…in her own way…and she happens to be honest.
Craig is a software salesman. It’s a hard job in this economy. And he comes home each day and talks a little bit about how hard it is. And I don’t ever feel the need to suggest that he’s not doing it right, or that he’s negative for noticing that it’s hard, or that maybe he shouldn’t even consider taking on more responsibility. And I doubt anybody comes by his office to make sure he’s ENJOYING HIMSELF. I doubt his boss peeks in his office and says: “This career stuff…it goes by so fast…ARE YOU ENJOYING EVERY MOMENT IN THERE, CRAIG???? CARPE DIEM, CRAIG!”
My point is this. I used to worry that not onlywas I failing to do a good enough job at parenting, but that I wasn’t enjoying it enough. Double failure. I felt guilty because I wasn’t in parental ecstasy every hour of every day and I wasn’t MAKING THE MOST OF EVERY MOMENT like the mamas in the parenting magazines seemed to be doing. I felt guilty because honestly, I was tired and cranky and ready for the day to be over quite often. And because I knew that one day, I’d wake up and the kids would be gone, and I’d be the old lady in the grocery store with my hand over my heart. Would I be able to say I enjoyed every moment? No.
But the fact remains that I will be that nostalgic lady. I just hope to be one with a clear memory. And here’s what I hope to say to the younger mama gritting her teeth in line:
“It’s helluva hard, isn’t it? You’re a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She’s my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime.” And hopefully, every once in a while, I’ll add- “Let me pick up that grocery bill for ya, sister. Go put those kids in the van and pull on up- I’ll have them bring your groceries out.”
Anyway. Clearly,Carpe Diemdoesn’t work for me.I can’t even carpe fifteen minutes in a row, so a whole diem is out of the question.
Here’s what does work for me:
There are two different types of time. Chronostime is what we live in. It’s regular time, it’s one minute at a time, it’s staring down the clock till bedtime time, it’s ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it’s four screaming minutes in time out time, it’s two hours till daddy gets home time. Chronosis the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.
Then there’s Kairos time. Kairos is God’s time. It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. It’s those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them.
Like when I actually stop what I’m doing and really look at Tish. I notice how perfectly smooth and brownish her skin is. I notice the perfect curves of her teeny elf mouth and her asianish brown eyes, and I breathe in her softTishy smell. In these moments, I see that her mouth is moving but I can’t hear her because all I can think is – This is the first time I’ve really seen Tish all day, and my God – she is so beautiful.Kairos.
Like when I’m stuck in chronos time in the grocery line and I’m haggard and annoyed and angry at the slow check-out clerk. And then I look at my cart and I’m transported out of chronos. And suddenly I notice the piles and piles of healthy food I’ll feed my children to grow their bodies and minds and I remember that most of the world’s mamas would kill for this opportunity. This chance to stand in a grocery line with enough money to pay. And I just stare at my cart. At the abundance. The bounty. Thank you, God. Kairos.
Or when I curl up in my cozy bed with Theo asleep at my feet and Craig asleep by my side and I listen to them both breathing. And for a moment, I think- how did a girl like me get so lucky? To go to bed each night surrounded by this breath, this love, this peace, this warmth? Kairos.
These kairos moments leave as fast as they come- but I mark them. I say the word kairosin my head each time I leave chronos. And at the end of the day, I don’t remember exactly what my kairos moments were, but I remember I had them. And that makes the pain of the daily parenting climb worth it.
If I had a couple Kairos moments during the day, I call it a success.
So as the new year is starting so is all the craziness with school schedules, birthday parties and Barret traveling around like a mad man trying to get ahead of the game!
This week was supposed to be my catch up week, but needless to say it has been my well….a week from HELL… I shouldn’t say that, but it has been a challenge. Barret left for Lake Tahoe for some staff enrichment (whatever that mean) and Druw and Cole have been sick since Tuesday. Lucky for me they waited until Tuesday because I spent Monday night hunched over the toilet puking…
Now it is Thursday… no school for Druw all week, 102 temperatures, but Cole is on antibiotics now and I think we may finally be on the mend! Is it summer yet? I don’t love this winter cold season months…ugh.
Moving onto more exciting things…I may have mentioned before about my Krazy couponing habit that I am just loving…(BTW I spent $1.98…on about $43 worth of products today…and yes actually things I needed or well wanted!) Anyway there is this new app called Shopkick that I just heard about that scores you points by walking into certain stores and then scanning products…sounds like so much fun. I can’t wait to try it out! And Yes, I did say Krazy!
My name is Leah and I am a mother of three boys, Jake who is 6 and Druw is 4 and Cole is 1 year. With 3 boys everyday is an adventure.
I love to run to keep my sanity and I coupon to afford the races I want to complete.
I ran all the way down to the midway and I am always surprised at how big it is when you are actually standing underneath it. From the street it just isn’t so intimidating.
